My blog has been so focused on weight loss, health, and dieting that I never even paused to discuss the mental changes that are already happening. I get it; I’m going to have to leave everything behind. My time here at the MCA is so precious to me that I can’t even fathom leaving this place.

When I got this job I was so proud to be working for a company that is “devoted to providing professional development and selected services to Marines.” All I’ve wanted to do is help people serving our country and I now do that every day. It is extremely gratifying.

This job has been so much more than that, too. The people are just as wholesome as the cause. Every single person that works here is both dedicated and amiable. I have come to think of this place as a sort of home – the people:  family.

I can tell you that I am scared of very few things in this endeavor. I don’t mind heights (my favorite thing to do is repel); I don’t think my physical limits will end up holding me back; I enjoy direction from my superiors (this means there’s structure, and I thrive on structure); travelling with or without my family always sounds like an adventure. There are 2 things, though, that put me on edge: 

1) The Quigley. I won’t mention this again. Ever.
2) Leaving the Marine Corps Association.

Part of me thinks that even if I fail to get into OCS for some reason or another, I know that I can stay happy here. This is not the case. My husband will just get stationed somewhere else and I’ll still have to go.

I know that I will absolutely love becoming a Marine. There are so many facets to the vocation that suit me, it’s ridiculous. But it’s this stupid civilian fear of change that rattles me. I know I’ll get over it. I’m just going to stay here (while in training) until the last possible moment.