Life as a Marine Corps spouse is full of opportunities to grow, learn, and support your family through the challenges of military life. Whether you’re navigating a PCS, raising a family, pursuing a career, or working on personal development, setting clear goals can help you stay focused and motivated. Using the SMART framework, along with thoughtful planning and realistic expectations, you can achieve meaningful progress even in the face of uncertainty.
Start SMART
The SMART goal-setting framework helps you create goals that are structured and actionable:
- Specific: Define your goal in a detailed and clear manner. For example, instead of saying, “I want to save money,” say, “I want to save $200 a month for the next six months to build an emergency fund.”
- Measurable: Determine how you’ll track your progress. If your goal is potty training your child, track how many days they successfully use the potty versus accidents.
- Achievable: Set goals that stretch you but are realistic. For instance, if you’re transitioning to a new duty station, it may not be feasible to start a new job immediately, but setting a goal to update your resume and start applying within the first month is realistic.
- Relevant: Align your goal with your priorities. If going back to school is important to you, consider why it matters now—perhaps to open up career opportunities once your spouse retires from the military.
- Time-bound: Give yourself a deadline. For instance, if your goal is to complete a course, set a timeline like, “I will enroll in the course by February and finish it by December.”
Identify and Mitigate Barriers
One of the most important strategies for success is identifying potential barriers early on. Military life is unpredictable, so it helps to think ahead. For example:
- Potty training during a PCS: Moving can disrupt routines, making potty training harder. Anticipate this challenge by packing a small bag with all the essentials—pull-ups, a potty seat, and extra clothes—so you can maintain consistency even during travel.
- Starting a new job at a new duty station: Research local job markets before you move. Update your resume and consider remote work options that may be more flexible during a transition.
- Going back to school: If childcare is a barrier, research programs near your base that offer affordable daycare options or online courses that fit your schedule.
- Saving money: Identify what expenses may arise during a PCS (e.g., gas, temporary lodging) and plan ahead. Cutting back on non-essentials during the months leading up to the move can help you stay on track.
Writing these barriers down and posting them somewhere visible, like a bathroom mirror or your planner, can serve as a powerful reminder to address them proactively. When you see your list, it encourages you to find ways to mitigate or avoid these obstacles altogether.
Be Cautious About Where You Seek Support
Support is essential when pursuing your goals, but it’s important to be mindful of where you get it. Social media can be helpful for connecting with others, but it can also be counterproductive if you find yourself comparing your journey to others’. For example, a Facebook group on potty training may give you tips, but it might also lead to frustration if you compare your child’s progress to others.
Instead, I like to lean on a trusted friend or “battle buddy”—someone who knows me well and can offer honest feedback. This could be a spouse friend who has been through similar challenges or someone you trust to encourage and guide you without judgment.
No Goal Is Too Big or Too Small
Every goal matters, no matter its size. Writing your goals down helps turn them from abstract ideas into actionable steps. For example:
- If your goal is to save money, break it into smaller steps like meal planning or avoiding takeout for a month.
- If you want to get a job, start by dedicating time to updating your LinkedIn profile or attending a local job fair.
- If you’re working on potty training, focus on small wins, like getting your child to sit on the potty willingly.
Celebrate Successes and Adapt
Celebrating milestones keeps you motivated. If your child successfully uses the potty for an entire day, reward them (and yourself!). If you land an interview for a new job, treat it as progress, even if you don’t get the offer.
Expect setbacks and plan for them. PCS moves, deployments, or unexpected life events might require you to adjust your goals. That’s okay. Moving the goal line isn’t failure—it’s flexibility.
Give Yourself Grace
Finally, give yourself grace. Military life is unpredictable, and you won’t always meet your goals perfectly. What matters most is your effort and growth. Whether you’re potty training a toddler, transitioning careers, or saving for a rainy day, remind yourself that progress, no matter how small, is still progress. Lean on your battle buddy, adapt when needed, and celebrate every step forward—you’ve got this!
About the Author:
Marta Sullivan is a veteran and spouse of an active-duty Marine. She is passionate about programs and initiatives that support and promote the well-being, quality of life, professional development, and economic opportunity of military spouses, veterans, and their families. She currently serves as the Director of Engagement and Outreach at the Marine Corps Association.